Rhapsody,
Thank you so much for your kind post!!! This is a very difficult topic for me to bring up (one I'm way too ashamed to discuss in real life), but I do want other people to be aware of it. I definitely got all mixed up about sexuality and attribute that back to the corporal punishment. I suspect that when kids are really young it's not likely to be anything other than what it's supposed to be (a deterrent or whatever). But once sexual development begins, any kind of intense experience (punishment/watching others be punished) could probably somehow get tied into sexuality. That's why the practice scares me. I have felt the lack of intimacy that can be a result of a deviant sexual relationship (I'm not suggesting that all deviance is bad, but when it gets to be way more than a "spice" it can be detrimental I think!).
Thanks for listening,
Sidony
(edited to add trigger icon)