Sorry guys, just re posted this from my previos thread Depression Round 2. I'm losing it and I'd like some feedback if possible.

Please help! I totally just pulled a stalker move on my ex and showed up at his house. After I caught him practically running away from me he agreed to have a coffee and he said that I was crazy and that I needed help, that he couldnt cope with my depression, that if I ever showed up at his house again hed call my parents and hes never speak to me again. He said that he could only be my friend and that he didnt want to date anyone at all. He said that he could meet me for lunch during the week and work on being friends from there. I ****ed up so bad.... and the worst thing is that i dont want to be friends, I cant just see him once in a while and not want to be with him. I also feel kinda taken advantage of, ive done so much for him and now when im in a rough patch ive been abandoned. He probably just said the thing about lunch to get rid of me, and i most likely will never hear from him again. I ****ed up so bad.... what is WRONG with me?!?!?!?!?!

I dont know what to do with myself, I am freaking out.