I just joined today and I looked at your post FIRST. There is a reason why. I know you are hurting and you know that you are hurting! You are only 15! You ARE VERY SMART and it displayed by your writing and to be able to tell others the way you feel and asking for help. I'm 40 and I have 3 kids and I'm just now find the strength to ask for help. I have been picking my face & body (self injury) for as long as I can remember. I have been trying to hide this from the world and it finally caught up to me. It has now caused more problems in my life. What I'm trying trying to say is you are much smarter than most people you are 15 and you are asking for help! People can tell you all day long not to hurt yourself. You need to tell yourself this minute this hour this day this week whatever.... I'm not going hurt myself. The part about people bumping into by accident, most people this days can't walk a straight line. Have you ever tried karate classes? It should like you could kick some butt I last thing. Please try this..... Listen to the song by Pharrel titled Happy.