Hi everyone,

Does anyone have strategies to deal with the following? My boyfriend and I have been dating about 3 1/2 years. His father is 70 years old and comes from a very different background and generation. He says highly offensive things, like calling my friend a b****, calling me an a**h***, and using the n word a LOT. If you plainly ask him to stop, he is likely to keep doing it even more. He uses a joking tone, so he doesn't consider it offensive. We only visit about every month or two so it's not like I have to deal with it all the time, but it does get old. I'm not going to stop coming because he's so old anyway he honestly won't be around forever, and I love seeing my boyfriend's mother who is as sweet as can be.

The one thing that worries me the most is if/when I have kids--I would not want them exposed to this environment. For myself, I get annoyed but I am an adult and I can move on and try not to get too upset. But I would feel differently if I had young children. What are the strategies you would use?