awsmnezz, so sorry for what you're going through.

Despite many challenges and difficulties, your post is full of many positives, your grades, your achievements, buying things with your own money, your friends, your spirit and positivity, and you analyzing your situation and speaking well and concisely for yourself. Adulthood is fast approaching and you soon won't be so dependent on your mother.

I recognize much of myself in your story, but wasn't so independent that I thought about leaving.

I later realized my parents were cruel to the children because THEY were very unhappy in the relationship. My mother was never happy with me because she was never happy-period. Your mom's "analysis" of your traits sounds utterly unreliable and clouded by her general unhappiness. I had a similar mom. If I had a do-over, I'd reject seeing myself through her jealous and clouded lens.

I hope you can minimize the space your mom takes in your brain. She's that unhappy women squawking in the distance and as much as possible best to turn down her volume. It's all the positives you talk about that will get you forward in the world. I don't say that as a hall pass to run rampant, but if you're doing well you can sort the real parenting--eat healthy, do your homework--from the garbage.

If I could talk to my 16-year-old self, I'd say "Look around for people who can help you!" Practically, I hope there are some smart and trusted adults in your life with whom you can help you find solutions over the next few years. Your dad, a special teacher, an aunt or uncle, a friend's parent, a friend of the family? I knew of high school kids who had unofficial adoptions, lived with someone else for their last years of school when a parent was incapable.

It's difficult. It's not fair that you have this problem this young. The mother you describe is an unhappy women, not up to the job. But sometimes if you look for them and ask, someone will appear to help. I know many special, accomplished adults who were forced to grow up too soon because of difficult circumstances. Ultimately it created their strong characters.

All the best.