Im sorry to hear you are struggling right now. Hopefully now that you have a job you will soon be able to afford to get stabilized on meds again. Since your husband does not want to go out with you, is there anything that you can be doing for yourself? Take time out for you, do something special for yourself? Take care of you, make you feel good? maybe go to a movie with a friend. invest and take special care of yourself. youre important.