Hey there

sounds like you're having a pretty rough time. If it helps any, most people don't know what they want. Hell, I don't know what I want and I'm paying exorbitant amounts of money to attempt to get through college and slowly failing so I mean lol. Ahem.
Anyway, I don't know if it's an option for you but community college or a small school can provide you with a 2 year associates degree if you're really feeling that bad about missing out on school. Or online classes and degrees. There are a lot of other ways to learn so please don't feel stuck
If you just don't know what you want to major in though that's a different sort of issue but looking through different programs in schools might help spark some interest!
Best of luck!