My dad physically abused me for most of my childhood. Emotionally he still does it to this day. At the moment due to the economy and my health I'm forced to live with him. If it was up to me I would have nothing to do with him, but he wants to be involved in my life as he thinks he did nothing wrong, and my mom requires me to be civil with him until I'm financially independent. Plus my therapist thinks that this relationship is the root of all my problems and wants me to heal it. But I can't even look at or hear him without thinking of the things he's done to me. I have nightmares every night. Just thinking about him makes me angry. I have no idea how I'm supposed to get over this. When my t mentions forgiveness I think he doesn't deserve my forgiveness after what he did. It's making me miserable 20 years later, but I don't know how to fix it.