My Pdoc and I decided to reduce my dose of risperidone over time and I am now down to the lowest possible dose once a day.

At the same time, there is a lot of stress at home right now.

I have been finding myself caught up in webs of thought. Thoughts just shoot off from other thoughts and create new thoughts and so on. I get totally wrapped up in this at times. The emotion roller coaster is usually part of this problem, and most of the time it starts with being angry, but sometimes it is triggered by other things.

I have also been experiencing some fleeting dissociation where things go fuzzy and feel unreal. Sometimes this feeling is accompanied by a mild paranoia, like thinking people are judging me or don't want me around.

And I'm seeing myself splitting again, yesterday the manager at work simply asked me to do something and I thought "I hate her!", out of nowhere. She didn't stab me in the eye or anything, she just asked me to fold towels!

Luckily, I have successfully been navigating this stuff using DBT skills, but it is so uncomfortable. I can't figure out if its the reduction in my meds or if its BPD symptoms triggered by stress.

Any thoughts? I was feeling so proud for being close to dropping another medication. The weight gain from it has been intolerable, I have put on forty pounds from it. If I don't absolutely need this med I want off of it.