Quote:
Originally Posted by LexisBee
Some things that i think can help would be:
1. Be as open as possible with her, don't hide away or shy from her, make sure she is involved in your life and every aspect.
2. As her how she is, make sure you keep her feelings in your heart to, let her express herself, if anything reassure her that if you both open up with one another it will help your communication.
3. Sometimes she may need time to take things in, don't get down on yourself if she seems distant, you need to remember that this is different for her.
4. In times of chaos when things are rough and you need alone time make sure she understands that you need time for yourself, for reflection, because i know i do a lot and most people mistake it for suicidal thoughts.
5. When you have suicidal thoughts make it clear you either need her or you need to be left alone, try to ease her mind though because she does really love you, and she cares.
6. Sometimes with these relationships maybe its best if she was part of your doctor appointments or therapy sessions, i know a therapist can really help with communication, this is crucial.
7. If you feel she is becoming stressed don't panic, sometimes we overwhelm ourselves with a million and one thoughts of someone else, we have to remember that we are struggling too.
8. expressing yourself is key. sometimes though i think there could be limits so if there is something that pains her to hear maybe it isn't best to let her know right away, maybe subtly hint to her things that are happening or bothering you.
9. Suicidal thoughts, i think its best to let her know when you are at your lowest, we all need someone.
10. Continue to ask her what she thinks or feels, its good for you to know where she stands with this all.
Good luck love, i wish you the best, and if you need someone i'm here too, i know how rough it is.  |
1. Wouldn't that just be ignoring what she feels like? I mean, she obviously doesn't really like to talk about me, so wouldn't that just be forcing her to listen? Will that help?^^
2. I'm trying the best I can. She told me recently that I'm good at listening and mental helping, so I guess it's allright about that.
3. I will! Thanks for reminding me
4. Never acutally tried to tell her that I need to be alone... Maybe that will help her to understand how serious this is.
5. In most cases it's just better to be alone, even if I would need somebody to talk. I mean, she isn't listening so talking to her does not help at all... Kinda curious what she will think when I tell her, that I really need to talk to her about that and that she has to listen...
6. I stopped the therapy a long time ago and I'm not about to start a new one... Might not be understandable but I hate doctors. The mental one most!
7. How do I react when she seems to be stressed?
8. The 'give hints' thing isn't really a good idea. She only hears what she wants to her and she is not thinking about stuff that I didn't CLEARLY tell her cause she doesn't understand often what I mean. Not sure whose fault that is.
9. The last time I mentioned something like that, she said something like "If it will help you..." ("Wenn es dir hilft..."). Yes she might be stressed and got some problems herself, but what the...?! I think she didn't understand what I mean by 'Maybe cutting myself will be the best for everyone here...'. Well, not the best idea to say something like that, but I didn't knew what I was doing... I was so desperate...
10. Asking her directly to the depression thing? Never did that before, cause I thought everything was clear... You think she might change her oppinion if I ask her directly?
And thanks to everyone again for offering me to talk to you! You are awesome!