Quote:
Originally Posted by Freewilled
Does this ever go away? This need? I feel like damaged goods.....my T can't fill it and like you said, denying the need only works for so long but feeding it can feel like it's still a bottomless pit that won't be filled. It only drains the other person. Is that what you mean?
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Exactly, exactly, EXACTLY this. I have hope that maybe it can be fed a little bit...but I'm still scared that eventually I'll do something to ruin it. These relationships have never ended well, but I'm a grownup now, and the need has gotten smaller, albeit only slightly. So maybe filling it partly with someone else and partly myself might help? I don't know...it's not like I have much of a choice.
I'm not draining her YET and T says it's her job to articulate her own boundaries, not mine, and thus far when she's set out a boundary I've followed it...and she knows her own limits better than I do...but still this guilt.