I don't consider myself fortunate to have my mother around. Unfortunately those of us with abusive parents experience a very different world than the OP. Undoubtedly my life would have been BETTER if my mother had died at some point in childhood. I would have been delivered from the he'll of living with someone who was cruel, selfish, and mentally ill. When she dies I won't grieve. I will feel as I did when my dad died, relief. Relief that the cruelty is gone, relief that I have escaped the torture of wondering why they could not love me..

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