I've noticed since I moved in with my boyfriend a few months ago, his neat tendencies have completely disappeared. Since I'm home all day, I do the cleaning, which is totally fine, but it would be nice if he'd be a little more proactive about picking up after himself. Also, we never talk about anything meaningful (he's probably afraid I'll cry) and the sex is nonexistent.

It's hard to be in a relationship when you're depressed, especially when it's like pulling teeth trying to get what you need. I've basically decided this is the way he is, and at 57, he's unlikely to change. Since accepting that, my own attitude toward him and our relationship has improved dramatically. There are still issues (always will be!) but instead of crying for hours about them, I just get irritated or frustrated.

I hope you can concentrate on taking care of yourself during this depression. That's the most important thing. I can't imagine how hard it must be to deal with messes when they make you anxious and even more depressed! I wish I could help. :-(

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