gave so much of my heart today. I need to remember that it is better to give than to receive. i got to talk with one of my kids today. That was so good. Still my heart ached for the one that could not even answer my cards. When I give up, she cries foul. When I do not give up she doesnt want me around. Its a no win. the only win here can be to get my heart to stop hurting about it. So that has to be my focus. To not blame myself. Thats the task at hand.