Thanks Talulah!

Talking to her on the phone reminded me of the trust I have with her. She talked more about my childhood trauma and I know she is very understanding and knowledgeable about it. She talked about how the memories are stored at the level of the child and we can get them processed (or whatever she called it) at the level of an adult and then I won't feel like the frightened child about it. It was comforting just to listen to her talk about it and it gave me hope that things could be better and she can help.

She is an insurance company provider but the new T isn't so they won't even know about her.

Other things to consider are that I've been feeling less anxiety and it could be beause of the imagery we've done about anxiety and her suggestion during that I will feel good; and when I looked at my reactions over the last month or so, I wonder if I am just reacting to getting near the hard stuff. A way of trying to back off. Definitely it is about control and feeling I have none.

I wonder if, in thinking of not returning to her, I think that I won't have to go there (to her office for therapy) and I won't have to "go there" (to the hard stuff).

We are wonderful and complex people, aren't we?!

Thanks for your encouragement, Talulah!