Sunrise, I hope you get a handle on what's going on in your life. That you beat it for four months is encouraging to me. I'm sure you'll be able to get that good feeling back

"Yep, there sure is, and I need to confront and handle this problem in my life. I can't not deal with it any longer. Maybe avoiding the problem helps me not be depressed, but I need to deal with this. But being depressed makes dealing with the problem harder. Sigh. I'm seeing my therapist next week for help. "

This exactly describes my life at the moment. I've been feeling better but in the back of my mind have been terrifed of crashing again. That's what I've always called it too. For me, it's happened many times. This last one, I finally decided to do something about it and it is helping. I just need to learn to trust that it won't come crashing down on me again. Take care!