Quote:
Originally Posted by ResaLock
Are we supposed to be attached? Personally I think the whole attachment thing is just an illusion. Of course many are attached and love their therapist. ...but I think people should get real honest with themselves and face reality about it.
Fact is, if you ran into your T when they were among their friends or family. don't ever think they would consider you there equal.
In reality, as little as they give to you in therapy which may be even more than anybody even your own circle of friends. They actually think you should pay them half your pay check just to talk to them. ...and I am sure their own friends that doesn't have to pay for their words, will get more close to them then you ever will.
Excuse me, but I think therapy should be honest and stop pulling people along.
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I am sorry that has been your experience. Mine is blessedly different. I was attached first to a high school counselor. She helped me through a painful year, empowered me, cared for me, validated me. That was about 23 years ago.
That attachment has stood the test of time for 23 years. Our attachment was an amazing pivot point in my life, nothing more real in my 37 years on the planet.
Attachment really isn't such an odd concept. Humans are social animals, attachment is necessary and natural for our species. Therapy can just bring that to a deeper level, particularly for folks like me who didn't get good enough attachment from our parents.
Regarding some of your specific points, therapists have to pay their bills, like we do, so yes, they charge. But many do pro bono work and many lower or eliminate fees for long term clients in need. Regarding equality, no doubt in my mind ever that I am my current therapist's equal and that her caring for me is not restricted to our paid sessions. I've had much evidence of that.
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Back to the original post: I did once do therapy for two years without being attached, and it was because I was suffering PTSD symptoms and needed relief: nightmares, dissociation, anxiety, etc. but... without the attachment, those two years were not very productive, and I finally gave up. I returned to therapy 19 years later and the attachment makes 1000% difference.