Hi my name is felicia. I'm 28, married with 2 kids and I'm bipolar. I have also had an ADHD without hyperactivity and OCD diagnosises with it but that changes from doc to doc. I knew something was wrong after I had my daughter and I wanted to throw her through the window. Doc said it was ppd. A few months later I was being retested for my pseudotumor cerebri dx and had an EEG and was told I had add and bipolar. I'm not sure how that works but I guess my brainwaves were different. I went to a therapist to see what they said. I was in fact diagnosed with both. I went through many meds and finally gave up all of it. This caused me to go into a severe manic episode where I completely tore my family apart. Luckily I was able to mend it when I fell back to earth. I went back to the t and got back on meds. Nothing was working so I asked for Zoloft as it worked wonders after I had my daughter. They warned it could make me manic. And did it ever. I completely lost my grip on reality. Hearing things. Seeing trolls in the trees outside my house. Wanting to hurt and kill people. I tried to admit myself and they had no room so they sent me to day treatment which helped aside from the meds. They also added the OCD diagnosis. I was finally deemed fit to leave. I finally found some relief but was taking so many meds. I then switched doctors and was told I was only bipolar 2. He took me off almost all my meds and put me on depakote with my lithium. He said he would get me off those in 2 years. I then lost my insurance. As such I haven't been to a doc or taken meds since probably sept or oct. I can't quite remember. For the most part I function okay. I can fake it till I make it like a pro. I have managed(barely) to hold onto my job and my husband hasn't given up on me yet. But I fear if he knows I'm having anxiety attacks again or that I've begun hearing things here and there he will commit me. And we can't afford that or to lose my income. I'm looking for insurance but can't afford any of it.

If you got to here. Thanks for reading my rambling convoluted mess up there. Meant to just say hi. Oh well.

Fefe