So...I am the one everyone talks to when they are stressed or having issues. My friends often joke that they wish I could be their counselor. At times they asks me to put on my "counselor hat" -- which is understandable. They need someone to listen. We all do. I love my friends...I just wish sometimes I could be supported and listened to...

I AM in school working on my MA in Professional Counseling...so I have skills to help people...to get them thinking about what they can do for themselves. And apparently I am good at it.

Couple of examples...

I had some major upsets to my finances and ability to pay for school - this was on Tuesday. I texted a friend and told her what was going on. And she was like, "do you want to talk, can I call you?" So she called...and we ended up talking about her stuff...she's been trying to figure out what to discuss and focus on in therapy with her therapist. And so we started talking about that...and it helped her. And it was nice to feel useful, but we didn't talk about what I needed to talk about.

Yesterday night, one of my other friends messages me about something she's been dealing with...so we talk through some of it. At the end she thanks me and says she doesn't know how she would get along without me. That I really helped her. And that it is my God given talent at work.

So tonight...I get some crazy news that kind of threw me and I texted this friend that I talked to last night. I told her what was going on and she said, "I'm being selfish and I'm emotionally spent tonight. I know it's unfair when u seem to always be able to help me when I need it. I don't feel I can be there for you right now and I'm sorry."

And it hurts...I mean at least she sees it...but it makes me sad. I'm always the one who is the "strong" one. I just wish I had friends who were there to support me when I need it. Because it seems that she says that kind of thing EVERY time I indicate a need for some support. It makes me feel like I am unimportant unless I can do something for someone else. Just me being me and sharing my stuff is not important to anyone -- except my counselor...but then that's what she's paid for.