((((((((SeptemberMorn)))))))))))
It broke my heart when I read that somehow the abuse made you feel like you were in love with him and then he left.
It's bad enough you were abused but then abandoned on top of it. It sucks that he confused you by giving you a false sense of intimacy with a mind so young, impressionable and vulnerable. I don't know why it's all coming back to you now-maybe something, subconsciencely, made you think of it.
I can indentify with what you've been through-my father abused me but I loved him to peices, regardless and then he just up and left. When he came back and continued the abuse, I still loved him. It makes me feel so sick and confused.
Please, know that you're not alone. ((((((((((SeptMorn))))))))