She sounds like she is very close to her father and just misses him. I grew up a similar way and only realized that the reason I was like that as I a got older was because one parent would spend more time with me and treated me better. Not saying you do not treat your daughter well but your daily interaction with her could be a problem. Are you always fighting, nagging, and not making life enjoyable for her? Are you worried more about discipline than your husband? Do you yell more, do you not spend quality time with her? All these questions need answers if you want a better understanding of a child's mindset.

You sort of have to look at it from her perspective and see what is making her feel this way. Is she unhappy with some other aspect of her life? Are you making her life fulfilling and as happy as you can?

Children do not understand the word hate and the significance behind that. I don't necessarily think of it as disrespectful, I think of it as expressing how they are feeling. Your husband may give her some comfort that you aren't/can't. I think many parents disregard children's feelings, but I think it is important to look deeply into this and try to improve your relationship with quality time and talking.