Mine was also a changed man when we started dating. He treated me like a princess for almost 3 years when his true colours started to show.

I think he kept it in check for so long because I broke up with him after I fell pregnant and he was committed to making me trust him.... but not for the right reasons

2 more years of red flags ( controlling manipulative behavior) and 2 physical instances of being choked and I still made excuses for him. I still thought he just slipped up, things will get better... the end of year 5 he finally did what he'd been itching to do all those years and beat me to a pulp.

5 years I wasted on him, and saddest part of all, I let my daughter know and lose a man who was never interested in being a father.
If I had just stayed gone, I would've raised her on my own from the start, because once I left he promptly forgot he had a daughter, although his concience nips at his heels twice a year, so he comes looking for her and I chase him off like a rabid dog.

She saved me though, I didn't leave because he beat me up. I left because I didn't want her growing up like that. I didn't want her paying for my decisions. Leaving wasn't easy, I struggled for nearly 3 years to actually do it.

Whyyy my life story?

Because yours speaks volumes to me.

I only hope that you're smarter and stronger than me, and that you'll run before it gets harder to do so.

Once the cycle starts, its hard to leave, you're invested, committed, and loyal. Plus the honeymoon phases are intoxicating and these jerks know just how to turn on the charm, you won't even recognize its abuse until you have 2 black eyes and some bruised ribs just for show.

Please, I know we're talking worst case scenarios here, but you wouldn't have posted if this was something you could just brush off and ignore. Listen to that voice that prompted this post, don't be another statistic. Please