Thanks. Im really struggling today. First thought image I had when I woke up this morning was me smashing my head against the way until my bed and head was covered in blood. I tried to go back to sleep but just dozed and had intrusive thoughts of doing horrible things to my partners penis (incredibly distressing). I got up again, "saw" myself pour the boiling water on my hands while trying to make my morning cup of tea, got online and had the urge to put something really inappropriate on my works FB page. By then I was crying, which turned into hysterical crying when I realise these thoughts are never ever going to leave me, "I just need to ignore them". The crying and memories of intrusive thoughts went on for 3 hours, I tried distraction and tension tamer tea. I didnt try any other techniques because I just couldnt think of them. My head was just screaming "help me". I've drugged myself now, I could not cope with it.

I see the pdoc tomorrow, I guess he will change meds, I have never found a med to stop them, but they have never been so frequent and I have never been so distressed by them.

Im not sure if it is stress related now. My partner says its hormones, we had been warned about mental illness getting worse as a side effect of the mirena. Im thinking its a combination of both.

I feel so much better now than I did this morning. Its scary how distressed and crazy I get. I feel like such an idiot once Im medicated and out of the episode.