I get having a partner who does not understand emotions. My husband has Asperger's and we have had similar arguments that you are having with your boyfriend. It is not easy and you both need to be on the same page for the relationship to survive. Your hospitalization is still pretty recent and so you are still very fragile with your emotions. Stick with therapy, get into a DBT group if you can.

Relationships in "normal" people are hard, throw in mental illness and relationships get even harder. It is possible to have a successful relationship when you have BPD you just have to work very hard at it. Our 12th wedding anniversary is in April and we just celebrated our 14th Valentine's together.