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Originally Posted by lynn808
hey cbox....
I read that and am wondering about this emptiness and disappointment.
now I never looked at it that way.....I kinda looked at mine as failure and the damaged abused artistic genius mind.....never stopping....well throw in regret and later life abuse ..and...anyway...I digress. sorry....
I am working on the acceptance of me,..not being a failure or a disappointment. So I definitely relate to what you have to say....But am intrigued with the emptiness as you describe it.
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I don't think I really began to question my identity until AFTER I completed dbt. It gave me the skills to accomplish things that I wouldn't have even tried prior to dbt, however my accomplishments didn't complete, fulfill or make me feel better about myself. If anything they made me more confused and discouraged. I didn't hate that I had accomplished something, but at the same time I felt letdown. Accomplishing something was more of a logical realization and didn't change how I perceived myself or the emptiness I felt. It made me question if that emptiness could ever be replaced. I told my therapist last week I think I could become the greatest guitar player on earth tomorrow and I'd still be left with the feeling of "This is it!" I do nothing and I feel empty, I accomplish something and I still feel empty even though I know it's logical that I shouldn't.
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How do you change that feeling? its kinda different that the loneliness?? do you meditate for it??
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I don't know! I think we're all different and what didn't work for me may work for you. I guess my only real advice is would be to think of something you did accomplish and think about how it made you feel. Did you feel different? Did it change how you perceive yourself? Did you see it as Big deal?
And yes emptiness is different than lonliness