They don't have the exact same genes you get you genes from all parts of different ancestors. That's why children don't necessarily have the same hair color as their parents.

My aunt has been mentally ill for at least my cousin's entire life. My mother seems to have been low grade depressed most of my life. My father has got to have some sort of mental defect. Like you nobody talks much about family history. Even stupid stuff... My fathers father was a photographer and I am a photographer. You'd think that would be of interest. My cousin heard this and I confirmed it through old newspaper articles via ancestry.

Which leads me to that very suggestion. You may be able to get surprising amount of information by going on ancestry since your father is so secretive. I even contacted a distant relative also on ancestry. You never know!

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk