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Originally Posted by Freewilled
I don't know if I could push my current T either, and I've been meeting with him for a whole year! I have done the empty chair technique a few times, though. It was really weird, but worked for me in some ways. I was able to touch on some feelings and almost (almost lol) forget that my T was there. It was a way to tell someone how I feel without really doing so and process some of the emotion. But I wouldn't have been able to do that on the second session. I probably did it about 3 months or so in....
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I did the empty chair before with a t and it was helpful and empowering but we had established a trusting relationship first. It did help to get in touch with my feelings and release some anger but I wasn't comfortable enough in front of her.
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Originally Posted by stopdog
May I ask what it is about pushing the therapist who asked to be pushed, that is difficult? I could push a therapist who said to push them and would not be bothered by it or think twice about it unless they tricked me somehow, and I so although I get that it is tough for you, i don't understand. Not that you need to tell me, but I am trying to understand.
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It's just that I would never push anyone or anything. I am very passive and gentle and it would be too controlling and violent to do. Especially to a female I had just met. Does that explain?
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Originally Posted by unlockingsanity
I agree.
You know, pushing is not what some people need. I thought I need to be pushed into talking about certain topics. It turns out, that really screwed up one therapy relationship.
Don't be afraid to tell your T that pushing doesn't work for you or telling her what does work. It's your therapy - get the most out of it! A simple "I think we're going too fast" would probably be super helpful. Remember, therapists can't read our minds. It's possible she doesn't realize she's pushing you too hard.
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maybe she doesn't realise it's too fast, I will have to say something this week about it.
It screwed up my first therapy too because the more people push me the more I close up: it's like reverse psychology with me. Maybe we are just not compatible or I am too scared of getting in touch with the feelings that I keep so well hidden because they hurt too much and because she is digging so deep I want to run away!