I am having such a hard time feeling like I'm getting "better" in therapy! My T says she's eclectic but has actively taken the CBT approach with me.
I dunno why, but this isn't really sticking for me. I try sooo hard to argue my patterend thinking (I DO have irrational thoughts and according to her, skewed perceptions) but at the end of this arguement in my head----i get nowhere. I keep coming back to the thought, the same thought.
She tells me, try to go back to the first time anyone told you this etc, or the first time you heard this etc and think if the source was reliable etc. It's so not working for me.

At an intelliectual level I know where much of my negative self talk originated but coming to this clarity hasn't changed a damn thing. I ruminate now as if my syptoms have worsened under this approach. I wonder if I'm failing at CBT or whatever. Furthermore I can't really explain why/how it's not working!!!!! Arghh, so frustrated. I'm sure my t can tell I'm not excellng at this. I wonder how to make it "click" for me. It seems to overwhelming a task for me to change years of thinking patterns. Plus, does this allow me the sense of healing? Not yet, I feel like all the past traumas are minimized, like I tell her one horrible thing, she thans me for sharing and tells me I'm courageou and then tries to "change" how I think about it.

I'm failing CBT..........

"I strongly believe that cbt serves to mask/prolong the repression of emotions for which clients enter therapy."

yea maybe that's happening.