I have been working with a women for almost 14 years now. I think I have had a crush on her from day one. We are both married. She is two years younger than me and we are in our 50s. Over the last year we have been working more closely. I never let her know how I feel and she has never given me any indication that she likes me, I think.

The problem is that six months ago I found out she had an affair with someone in the office about 10 years ago. Since then, I've been thinking there is a chance. I think about her all day long. First thing in the morning when I wake up and last thing at night before I sleep. We have socialized outside the office a few times with our spouses. She is very smart, sexy, classy and pretty. She is one of the only women I know that doesn't talk a lot.

My wife is a negative person. Doesn't like to travel, finds fault with people and isn't fun to be with. I always have fun with my work friend. I don't know if I love my wife anymore but wouldn't divorced. She would be crushed and I wouldn't do that to her.

I really want to put this obsession to an end and have tried but I just can't get her out of my mind.

My question is do I tell my work friend how I feel or just keep suffering?