I understand your confusion. I've had friendships where they drifted apart and that was acceptable. And I've had friendships where it doesn't matter if we live apart and don't see each other for months, we pick right back up.

But it's the friendships where there is a slow death because one of the parties begins to neglect the other that are the most painful - obviously for the neglectee rather than the neglecter.

When she moved, it may have taken her some time to jump into her new life. This probably wasn't a reflection on her relationship with you, but likely a coping mechanism for her handling all the associated emotions with a big move. She's finding friends and it would definitely feel like you are being replaced. But again, I say, it's probably not a reflection of your relationship. Some people have a really difficult time dealing with distance. At first, it was okay because you were both still living off the interesting things that a change in distance does to a relationship. But now that things have settled down, she's falling into a routine and perhaps the comfort you once provided her isn't something she needs to get through the day. That hurts. But it's also a natural progression. Take comfort in the fact that you helped her get to a more independent state in her new home.

The downside of this is that you are on the outside looking in now. And since you've said your goodbye, it might be difficult for her to be open to friendship again. While unintentional, you've taken her on a bit of a roller coaster ride by pushing her away as you tried to protect yourself from rejection.

Last year, I ended a friendship in a similar manner. The conversations became less frequent - always initiated by me. The contact dwindled until eventually I just had to say that I couldn't take it. I told him that I either needed to be in touch with him regularly, or not at all. I poured my heart out to him for a long time; when a person does that, they expect reciprocation or at the very least acknowledgement. When it stopped coming, I had to end it. I'm still not sure if it was the right decision. I wonder every day if he thinks of me. If he cares about what I went through. It's not an easy decision to make, but whatever your choice, you need to stick to it or you will never heal.

My heart goes out to you. Feel free to PM me if you need to vent.