WDF, localities and often states offer help for depression, etc. many offer help on a sliding scale or free of charge. I used my county's mental health center until I was able to pay. don't know if uve tried this avenue or not. Hoping u feel better soon. 
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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