Oh dear god, I know this feeling. Talk about STRESSFUL.

7 times out of 10, I can't force myself into it. Once I decide not to go, I am relieved, but then I have to deal with the HORRIBLE guilt. Most times, it is not worth the guilt alone, not to even mention the consequences of having to catch up on what I missed.

However...

Those few times that I can manage to get my ***** moving... I freak out the entire time getting there. It even takes me 10 minutes of deep breathing once I am there to settle down enough to figure out what is going on.

But once I am there, and in the moment.... I have no idea why I was freaking out in the first place. I even end up being proud of myself that I can contribute!!

Even if you just show up, you will feel better (EVEN if you are late). They wouldn't have asked to you be there if you weren't a helpful member of the team. Your input matters.

If you really can't manage it, you and everyone else will survive. It won't end the world. But maybe, it could change your day. Good luck and I hope you don't have to take the bus... that's just annoying.