RosePetals! I feel so bad for you!!! You said he is a loving man -- you can work through this!!! I hope you'll consider couples therapy. If I'd known then what I know now (in my last relationship), I would have tried couples therapy and might have been able to save the relationship. It'd at least give you a chance to talk about everything and find ways of dealing with the person who's interfering. 30+ years of love is nothing to take lightly! It's not good that he cheated on you years ago, but if he never even knew about his daughter and has been part of a loving family all these years, then he is a good person. Work on your relationship together! I'm still regretting how I let the last one fall apart. :-(

Best of luck,
Sidony