I agree about going in voluntary. its much better. and you have the choice of which hospital you go to.. some hospitals are short of money and group everyone together... and treatment is horrible. others are better. I was in several. good and bad. some scary. but I am proud of you for coming into this site and asking for help. that is the first step. sexual abuse or what ever you have gone through can paralyze you. if left hidden in your brain. it can make you suicidal. you need to get this out. to a therapist. talk it out.. scream it out in a safe environament.. where if the feeling make you feel suicidal someon will be there to help you.. keep you safe.. is it is , no, im not going to say it is.. its hard.. I had to draw a picture of what happened to me.. I didn't even know that is why I tried to commit suicide till I started remembering.. I pushed it so far back in my mind it destroy so many things in my life.. than it was going to destroy me.. unfortunately I didn't have the guts to ask for help before my attempt.. that I why I am so so proud you have ask.. please seek out help.. find a therapist or if your really scared your going to hurt yourself. take yourself to an emergency room. and ask for help.. you can do this. and yes it does help.. getting it out. working on it does help. and being in a safe environment till the suicidal feeling pass. you will see that you will work through this. please let me know how you do if you do have a therapist please let him know how you feel