I had a definite reaction to your post, and write hoping that I'm saying something you already suspect. You mentioned this yourself when you said she's risking losing her license.

As heartbreaking as this is, it sounds like she is creeping toward a relationship which ultimately would be very harming. Boundary violations often begin with the declaration that this situation is different, the people are exempt from the rules and this out of bounds behavior is therapeutic. It's referred to as the "slippery slope." Even if this goes no further, it's far beyond professional boundaries. As you know the relationship isn't "normal" because of its built-in asymmetry.

I strongly suggest either a second opinion and/or contacting
TELL: Therapy Exploitation Link Line In addition to resources, there is reading etc. I also suggest scanning this forum for those who had a personal relationship with the therapist and the painful aftermath.

I appreciate the strong feelings involved. There were clues in your post you have your own doubts and perhaps seek a hand to pull you out of the morass.Wishing you the best finding your way through.