I'm just curious (it's not clear from your post): have you tried expressing your concerns to your T? From the beginning of your post it sounded like you got some relief from speaking with her.
I also have BPD/c-PTSD (and dissociation) and a lot of time I feel like my T seems more interested in my wife and kids than in me. It seems like he is always swinging our talks around to how it relates to my family. When I mention that I am not happy with my wife, he seems to take her side. Any ways, I asked him about this and was satisfied with his response and continue to see him because, outside of this, I like the direction things have gone in. That is why I ask if you have discussed how you feel with your T.