She was so wonderful about this...which is why it feels like I'm taking advantage of her because she has told me explicitly in the past that I shouldn't call/email/ask for contact between sessions, and I understand her reasoning, and I broke the rules anyway, and she was still so kind to me. She will probably want to discuss it at least a little on Wednesday, which I'm fine with...but today talking to her just helped so much.

I even told her about how I sometimes feel like my memories aren't real because I can see things from my mother's point of view and it makes sense, and T said that it's really normal for kids who have been mistreated (she doesn't say "abused"; she knows I'm not super comfortable thinking about myself that way) to doubt themselves, and that she knows it's really tough.

And it just felt so good to me to hear that...it feels like I'm being rewarded for doing something bad when instead she should impose even greater restrictions so I don't do that bad thing again. But that's not what I NEED and she knows that...