Thread: Hard Session
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Old Feb 24, 2014, 09:12 PM
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tealBumblebee tealBumblebee is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2013
Location: USA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MdngtRain View Post
Hey there, I know I'm kinda late, but wanted to chime in. Back in December, I disclosed details of some of the past, though I hadn't planned on it. We had talked about something else the week before, and it all kinda just spilled in detail into a journal to her. I ended up reading it all to her a few days later (went in for an early session because it was too much to handle for a whole other week). I was really conflicted about telling her. They were things NO ONE had ever heard before, and it was horribly vulnerable. But afterwards it all felt better. It took a few days to get there, but somehow the act of reading it all out to her relieved some of the internal pressure. I'm not quite sure how I got through those days that were torture. There was a lot more writing (addressed to her, but never handed over), and a lot of sh urges, but then it just left one day. I think maybe her telling me it wasn't my fault kinda sunk in. She didn't treat me like a freak or a demon... Maybe that was what made the biggest difference: she remained supportive even after that session. She still is, and that's helpful when the self-doubt and self-loathing get loud...
I'm glad you were able to share with your T, but I'm sorry it's causing so much turmoil in the aftermath. I hope you can find a way through it without the sh...

I'm glad it worked out for you in the end. Everyone's 'relief' post-release is at least encouraging. I don't think we're there yet - we only touched the surface of the secret and that was enough to take up the whole session. I'm feeling much less angry now but kind of just lost because i'm not sure what i'm supposed to be doing or how i'm supposed to be dealing. I'm glad your T remained supportive; mine tried but my head is pushing her way and skewing her compassion with a cynical tone. It's frustrating. At least though, as you guys say, it will pass. Thanks for that hope.
Hugs from:
ThisWayOut