I had the same reaction when my grandfather. I think as someone else stated - everyone has their own way of coping. I never did cry and those feelings never 'caught up'. He runs across my mind every now and then but it wasn't like I saw him daily anyways so it wasn't like I missed a dominant presence. Love him but just not necessary for me to react the way that many people have been conditioned to. Perhaps that's the same with you? *big hugs and my condolences*