Hi UM, I know lame alternative

but
really want you to be safe so......maybe real good workout at the gym or is there anything else that gets the blood pumping a bit (other than cutting!) that gets the blood pumping.
Just to give you something temporary and some more space to work on things underlying how you're feeling if you just
really need a bit of a fix??
And if you want any support, here for you......
Alison