I can pretty much eat now without stress, and I used to have panic attacks and/or throw up at every meal. But sometimes I still can't be bothered to eat. I have a lot fewer days where everything hurts and I can't feel too exhausted to do anything but I still don't really want to do anything and would rather stay in bed. I don't hate my body so much, but I don't really care about it either. I can sleep a little bit better. I don't feel the urgent need to self-harm or plan suicide to get out of the pain but I don't really care about life or enjoy anything either. I feel a lot more tolerant yet when I do the questionnaire thing at therapy my depression score seems very high (though the anxiety score has gone right down, which matches my experience). Is it just that I have to force myself through this while the pain is less until I eventually start enjoying things and seeing the point? Or are the meds just not right for me? Or is it just my personality? Am I just unappreciative? Is this how normal people feel?