You know one of the concepts in shamanism is walking fluidly in both the spirit world and the world we live in. The actual journeying is a lot like psychosis but it is balanced with being able to function in the real world when needed. So look if you're going to be on 4mg you're already going to shift things further toward psychosis...maybe it will be enough to be able to function in both worlds. The problem is if you stop taking the meds and are lost to psychosis entirely then there is a really good chance you'll end up back in the hospital and then what happens....they may stabilize you and the game begins again but what if they can't? A lot of people report a further drop in intelligence and functionality with every break. So much for ideas..some people can no longer talk...what happens then? If you get to that point it's probably the state hospital...I know I don't want that for you but the question is what do you want?