Ok, this is more than you ever wanted to know, but here goes.

I have your problem, except that I was bullied for my lack of musical ear when I was a child. The main bully was my mom's elder sister, a professor of musicology. I thought that I was tone deaf. I was embarrassed beyond belief. I would not sing along around camp fire for fear of being ridiculed.

But I love music. And rhythmical poetry, too. So, decades later, I have decided to do something about it.

1. Harvard University has an online tool that determines your pitch. Mine is in the 20th-30th percentile, better when I used headphones. Now, that is low, but not completely tone deaf
I talked to the director emeritus of my local music school. Told him the story. He asked me to sing (while talking on the phone with him). He told me that I was not hopeless. As an assignment, he told me to sing along in the car while listening to three songs that I have known since childhood. Do that for a month. If there is progress, take voice lessons and aural training lessons. I made progress, but cannot afford lessons now. One day I will.

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