Des, I know all about that pain. I've been living with it for awhile now. Yet, so has she. She discovered that she could no longer pretend to be happy being in a relationship with me. She did what she had to do to fulfill herself. I can't say I understand everything she has done, but I understand the basis of it. She has to find herself in the world today. If that's something you haven't realized as of yet, then you have to do it.

There are ways of doing it though that can be satisfying to both you and your husband (I mean, as satisfying as they can be). My ex-girlfriend did a complete 360 and turned into a selfish, childish, and self-centered person instead of the kind, loving, and thoughtful person she once was. Her explanation is that she has to act that way in order to get what she wants. I personally believe that a person should not strive for those types of feelings, as they only turn out bad in the long run. She chose to become that type of a person, but you could choose to turn into a more level-headed and well-grounded woman.

I believe it all depends on how you act towards the people around you when you are discovering who you want to be. I hope all goes well in your decision. Take time with it, and keep us posted...

(((((((((((((((((((Des)))))))))))))))))