I'd go as far as saying and I'm treading on dangerous territory her but I will say it anyway.. he's picked the job partially for the exact purpose that he doesn't want to deal. wtih life, family or anything. The job is low stress, thats the motivator for one for him to take it. It's not about money so it's about not dealing with the reality of actually doing something. So the job factor and the type of job he took is very telling. Coupled with the idea that he is away from you more, sleeps the rest of the time and doesn't feel the need to be around you is telling me that he is avoiding anythign responsible. He wants his cake and eat it too. He wants the life of leisure like a single man without responsibililties but wants to pretend that he's actually still in a marriage which IMO, he's not anymore. He's an absent husband and father, and this, doing so on purpose. I won't even go into why he might feel the need to do this, it's wrong no matter what. But the problem is, until he has a problem with it, until he sees what he's doing - avoiding most real life, he won't do anything about it.

I wish I had advice for how to help you get him back involved but I really don't. A brick to the proverbial head maybe? idk.

My heart goes out to you though. I'm sory you're going through this.