I have worked in health care food service for many, many years. Most of the time I would be what you would consider to be the assistant manager until I became totally fed up with things and transfered to patient care. I still see what goes on in the kitchen though.

It sounds like you have two problems. I will deal with the easy one first. People seem to think eating the food is OK even though it is technically stealing. Unless you are the person responsible for the budget, don't let it upset you. I'm sure the food cost is higher because of the extra food that is being bought and produced and not used for the residents but it is up to the managers to control that. If you are not responsible for the money, you are not responsible for people eating food. Your manager obviously doesn't care.

Secondly, the sanitation sounds awful. Do you have a health department that inspects your facility? Call them anonymously. If there is no health department I would guess you have periodic inspections by the state. Give them a tip off also. If you are inspected by JCAHO, they would react immediately if they knew what was happening. If you do not want to go to the regulatory agencies, see if there is a nurse or someone in charge of infection control and talk to them.

It sounds like you care very much for your job and for your residents which is commendable. Try to remember, you can only control yourself and you are not responsible for how other people act. It is hard to watch others be so careless but in the long run it is best for you to learn to ignore it and keep your own nose clean.