Hello, I'm a 20 year old college student, and I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. There are many things I would like to change about our relationship. We don't fight often....[Not to say we never fought...Our 1st year was very rocky, we had endless fights]. However, I don't like the level our relationship is on. Here's a little background on us on our lifestyle:
We attend a university which we despise. Due to bad culture clash [we're from the city and the school is in the country], neither of us have made many friends. When we first started our relationship, we wanted to spend a lot of time together. This was difficult for us, because transportation is terrible at this school, and I lived across town from him. So, we decided it would be easier to let me live with him. We were only some 3 or 4 months into the relationship when we started doing this....And our relationship wasn't on the right level for that yet. To make matters worse, there really isn''t much to do around campus except party, and we're not big partyers. So, we've gotten in the habit of staying indoors and maybe see a movie on the weekends, or go and get something to eat out. Clearly, we spend A LOT of time together.....A lot. And we get very, very bored. So, we'll annoy the %#@&#! outta one another. For example, sometimes I feel like he acts as if he's my little brother than my boyfriend. So, I'll bug the %#@&#! outta him back. Or vice versa. I'll bring this up to try and fix it, but he'll either blame me or make an excuse....Or things will change, just not for long. This only bothers me only because I feel like this whole 'annoying the %#@&#! outta eachother' thing is all that makes up our relationship since we're so damn bored. If it was a small part, fine I could deal with that, but it's totally in excess because the rest of our lives arn't very fulfilling.... We don't have much to talk about anymore. We're moody because we don't like this school. We don't really have a group of friends to hang out with. We don't have much independence from one another because I rely on him for rides, but he seems to want me in the apartment regardless. We're strapped for cash, so we can't spend much money doing things, he especially doesn't like to drive anymore than he has to because that would waste gas. We have many interests in common, however, he's usually not interested in going places or doing things I'd like to do, and vice versa. For example, I'll suggest we see a guest speaker who'll come to the university, but he won't be interested....and I won't really have anyone else to go with, so I won't go [and chances are he won't want to drive me, either]. He'll want me to learn about his fantasy baseball team, but I can't bring myself to get into it like him, so I won't join him or his friends in their fantasy baseball stuff.
The time we spend together is not quality time, and we clearly spend too much time together. I havn't been interested in sex for weeks now. I'm not sure how to eradicate this, especially since we are academic people on a non-academic campus [nothing much going on in the clubs, I rely on him for rides around the town which puts a huge strain on him, and the town itself is in the middle of nowhere so there's nothing to do except drink excessivly like most kids do on campus]. I want to be able to do things on my own, but I don't have the means, and the things I'd like to do around campus are a joke. I feel stuck in this apartment of his. He feels stuck too. I'm hesitant to move out, because it would take out a lot of time out of our busy schedules for me to move back to my dorm. However, I believe the small amounts of time we would have together would be of more quality.
Sooo here's the twist. This is our last semester on campus, we've decided to transfer out. He's said he'll be willing to go wherever I go, which I don't mind. He wants to get an apartment with me wherever we end up, but I'm not sure if I'm comfortable with that. I'm afraid the 'living together' type relationship problems we are having won't go away, even if I move back to my dorm for the rest of the semester, and that the problems we are having now won't get addressed properly and they'll just follow us to wherever we both decide to go....Even if we end up in a better place. I'm not sure if it would be more benificial to live with him while still trying to fix our relationship after we transfer, or to go live with a complete stranger [thus putting strain on him to either live w/ someone he doesn't know, or force him to search for a single person apartment AND shell out the extra cash for it]. I'm also worried things won't change. How can I start changing things now? What should I be syaing to him about all of this? I want to believe our relationship can be more fulfilling if we were happier and in a town/school we liked.....And I think it would especially be better if we spent more time apart to do things on our own with our own friends [or with freinds together], but what if things remain the same AND we are financially tied? How can we get to a level in our relationship which is more fulfilling and less stressful? Or, how can we make our relationship better in general, before we take this big 'moving in together' step?....Should we even move in together?

Thanks so much for your time, I know this is long, haha.