Gencat,
I can understand what you mean. I did the same thing during middle school and highschool. Disappearing is a coping mechanism I think. It was better than being teased and bullied. Sometimes everything felt surreal.

Don't let yourself get too deep into yourself. Getting out again can be hard. What works at one age, eventually no longer works or even becomes destructive.

The one good thing about disappearing is the chance to observe the behavior of others. Nothing is staged or fake. You get a clear view of the people around you and the way they react and act. Later on, even though you didn't participate in social circles, you can at least act normal. Many times people don't notice anything fake about your actions. That sounds a little like a sociopath, and they do observe and copy, but I'm talking about surviving and learning to deal with the world when you can fight your way back.

I know it seems like how you feel will never end, it will at least change. Life is not static. Social groups change, age changes and the way we look at the world changes. Don't give up on yourself. Things can seem extrordinarily bad, only to turn around and either change or get better.

Sam2