FWIW, MusicalRaven, I was about 270lbs on my wedding day. I truly believe that it was an issue with your ex, not an issue with you.
I think the first step for the here and now is going to be making a decision. And it's not easy! I'm not going to tell you what that choice is because I'm not in your shoes. Only you can decide. But it could be making the choice between learning to love yourself a little more or getting healthier by improving your physical status. But as much as being single can be terribly lonely, it seems to me that you need to gain some inner strength right about now. I know it's hard, believe me. I've personally been on this "self-improvement journey" for 2 years now. But it is worth it. *You* are worth it.

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