Dealing with so many emotions right now. But the worst is been in complete denial. I can't understand that he doesn't love me and that he sees all that I'm going through and not caring at all. This is what hurts the most. I'm still hoping that he wakes up and realize that he made a mistake. I know that's super crazy. How can I want to be with a person that treads me this way. I have no sense of pride or self love. The worts time is in the morning or at night time I find it incredible hard not to know what he is doing and where is he. He has not been responsive to any of my ways to reach out to him. I know is simple. He just doesn't care what happens to me. He is been incredibly selfish. How can I change? I get into obsessive behavior calling him and texting him and when I'm doing it I don't see that I have no control of making him care. Then I get stress and start having lots of anxiety to the point that I physically feel I'm going to have a heart attack then I cry uncontrollably. I have No way of getting professional help right now. Does anybody know how to get free counseling in the New York area? I know I need it badly.